Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
