i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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