Duck Duck Cougar?
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
