we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
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Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
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I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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