her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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