party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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