M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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