dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
