I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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