SEEEEXXX PLEASE
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
