I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Randomize
