awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
