butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
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