Do vagina's smell?
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Why can't burritos get me drunk
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
