I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Randomize