I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Randomize
