Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
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She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
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You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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