i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Randomize
