I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
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that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
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I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud