I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
