my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
