Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I got inside last night via doggy door
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Randomize
