u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
