Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
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