it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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