Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
