Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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