Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
