He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Let's paint friendship bongs
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
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