im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
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