It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
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