Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize
