drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
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