So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
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at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
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Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
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