Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
