Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
