Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
