Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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