anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
