Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
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