I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
