terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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