The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Randomize
