Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize