DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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