yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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