do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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