My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
