She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
