Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
When did angry sex become our thing?
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
