fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Two words: blizzard sex
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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